As mamas, the vast majority of the schedule and routine and all the invisible details of making our homes and our children outside of the home – whether at daycare, school, enrichment activities, and sports, fall squarely on our shoulders.
Even when we support from our partners or friends, we still have to delegate-which is part of the invisible mental load of motherhood.
And often last on the list is what we need to take care of ourselves and thrive in motherhood!
I see this not only supporting moms at work but also in myself and with my friends, it’s almost as if we put everyone ahead of ourselves leaving self-care as an optional activity to get to when we can.
A mindset and packed schedule doing for everyone but yourself creates even more stress and creates a belief that prioritizes productivity over the quality of our health and well-being.
So much of motherhood is about getting things done and taking care of all the supporting roles of modern living.
Perhaps you’re reading this and saying-where am I supposed to find the time to take care of myself when there is so much to do?
Believe me, I get it!
Time and energy are the greatest resources in parenting!
And here is what I know: motherhood isn’t meant to be all about productivity and getting things done for your family. Motherhood is about taking the time to savor the moments with your family, connecting with those you love and sharing moments together.
And mothering requires an enormous amount of time, energy, and dedication. And the energy needed to sustain eighteen years of mothering (or more and per child) is learning the skill of taking care of yourself.
I want to encourage you to take some time to think of what YOU need as the school year starts.
Here’s the thing about motherhood: it’s an ever-evolving role and journey.
What we may need to take care of ourselves at one point of mothering often changes as our children grow, and families evolve.
Which is why checking in with what YOU need to do to take care of yourself, is something to do often, whether it’s daily or weekly. The point is, YOU HAVE TO CHECK-IN with yourself and ask what you may need. And then-listen and honor what you need!
I want to encourage you to ask yourself:
What do I need to do every day to take care of myself?
What may be missing in my daily or weekly routine that I’ve been wanting to do or wanting to try that would reduce stress and bring me happiness?
What are the biggest challenges right now in my family life or work life that I can address and set some goals to reduce stress?
Is there something on my list of responsibilities I can let go of or delegate to my sweetie a few times a week to make more time for self-care?
Taking care of ourselves begins with getting in the habit and practice of asking ourselves what we need to feel healthy, happy, content, and reduce stress.
And what works for you may not work for someone else.
Which is why when it comes to taking care of ourselves, we have to spend some time reflecting on what we need, what will restore and replenish all that we give to our families.
And if you’d like some support and structure on how to do that, please consider taking the online course: From Surviving to Thriving Course. This course is created from my heart, to encourage and teach you the skills on how to thrive in motherhood, with the same skills and wisdom I share with moms in the therapy hour.
While it’s not therapy, it sure is therapeutic!
And the course is so easy, and manageable-you can listen to the topics as a podcast or watch the videos.
Either way, you’ll hear my suggestions on how to increase self-care in your life and receive a 100+page workbook to accompany the topics with self-guided questions and information to help you find the ways to improve your self-care and well-being. I’d love to have you join the Thriving Mama Community and get the support you need this school year to thrive in motherhood!
I developed this course using the same skills and strategies I use with moms in the therapy hour. And while the course isn’t therapy, it is therapeutic and it will help you! All you need is thirty minutes to watch the video ( or listen as MP3) and complete the questions in the workbook. And best of all, once a week you can join a conference call to ask me your questions or advice and connect with other mamas in the thriving mama community! I love this course so much, it has helped so many mamas get on track with making taking care of themselves, and I’d love to have you join!
If you’d like to learn more and watch the introduction video please go here: From Surviving to Thriving: Creating More Joy, Calm and Happiness in Motherhood. And if you have questions or want to learn more about the course, I’d love for you to reach out and share your questions.
Here’s to taking care of ourselves mama, because YOU matter more than you know!
© Dr. Claire Nicogossian 2019