The modern world is busy, noisy, and fast-paced. Smart-phones have made us accessible to everyone and anyone 24/7 all year long. And this sense of being available all the time paired with a push for productivity is a set up for burnout, stress, and exhaustion.
And too much productivity, without rest, can be a set-up for incredible stress and burnout.
I see this all the time in the therapy room, especially with moms.
Moms are often so focused on productivity and getting things done for everyone, all the time, leaving no time for rest.
Productivity is embraced, and self-care feels indulgent.
What I often see is this: moms believe if they’re not productive-doing something for someone she’s lazy.
And when she does take time to take care of herself or is not productive and actually resting because she’s exhausted–she feels guilty and has negative thoughts like, ‘I’m so lazy.’
Here’s what I believe, I don’t think moms can ever really be lazy!
The definition of lazy means: not energetic or able to do work.
I think if a mom ‘looks‘ or ‘feels’ lazy, chances are she’s exhausted, needs more support and help, and has used up all of her energy and something is forcing her to stop and rest.
Here are some of my reasons why moms need to find time to rest:
- Always being productive is a set-up for burnout
- Rest allows our body, mind, and spirit to restore and replenish
- Building in time for rest, in the long run, creates resiliency and helps us to be more productive
- Buying into the mindset of productivity and being busy all the time takes away happiness and well-being
- Taking time to rest improves our mental health and well-being
- Rest boosts creativity and problem solving
- Taking time to rest helps to manage stress
If and when you find yourself saying, ‘I’m so lazy,’ I want you to ask yourself:
- Am I really being lazy or have I been so productive lately without a break and I’m exhausted?
- How does labeling what I’m doing as lazy help me or create more stress and negative thoughts of myself?
- If a friend was doing the exact thing I’m doing right now, would I call her lazy?
- Where do these standards of productivity I place on myself come from?
- Is there a more compassionate way to talk to myself right now?
- Do I value taking time to rest and put a hold on productivity?
When you do take time for yourself to rest I want you to remind yourself:
- Your value is not measured by how productive you are
- Only you can know what you need to take care of yourself
- Taking care of yourself is an act of self-love (knowing your worth and that you matter)
And most importantly, You matter so very much! Take that break, you truly deserve it!
© Dr. Claire Nicogossian 2019